Episode 59 - "Who's Aunt Rose?"



OPENING SEQUENCE


(Wide shot across the rooftops of about fifty houses at dusk. Snuffy's guitar plays through the opening scenes.)

I grew up in a neighborhood that was a lot like other neighborhoods.

(Fade to shot down a sidewalk and row of lamps posts as the final lamp is turned on.)

Where the boxes we lived in were distinguished only by the names on the mailboxes...

(Fade to shot from the middle of a street as a white car (Valiant?) approaches and turns into a driveway.)

And the cars in the driveways.

Fade to

Ext. Evening - Arnold Kitchen

(Shot through the kitchen door window of the Arnold's eating dinner and talking. The camera moves in.)

It was a place where hard-working Americans circled their wagons to protect themselves from the outside world.

Fade to

Int. Evening - Arnold Kitchen

(Shot from behind Norma of the Arnold's seated around the table, eating and talking. TV news is on. Music continues.)

JACK: Wayne, don't forget the trash - tomorrow's Tuesday.

WAYNE: Hey, it's Kevin's turn. (Frowns.)

KEVIN: No, it's not!

JACK: Just...do it.

(Close shot of Kevin looking at Jack and Wayne off-screen and frowning.)

Our lives were made up of little moments...

(Kevin turns to his food.)

(Close shot of Norma looking at Kevin off-screen and holding up a bowl.)

NORMA: More scalloped potatoes, honey?

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne. Wayne's looking toward the off-screen TV. Kevin's poking his food.)

All delicately intertwined.

(Kevin looks up.)

KEVIN: Oh, thanks Mom.

(Close shot of Norma looking at Jack off-screen.)

NORMA: Karen called today.

(Close shot of Jack looking toward the center of the table.)

JACK: How much?

(Close shot of Norma looking at Jack off-screen.)

NORMA: Just...thirty-five dollars till the end of the month. (Frowns.)

TV (V/O): The Nixon administration said today...

(Close shot of Jack as he shrugs and nods slightly.)

JACK: Send her a check.

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne reaching for a roll. Wayne grabs it. They look at each other.)

KEVIN: Hey, that's mine! (Frowns.)

WAYNE: Not anymore, angelface.

(Wayne smiles exxageratedly, and holds up the roll. Kevin reaches for it and Wayne pulls it back - twice.)

NORMA (V/O): Wayne...

(Close shot of Norma looking from Wayne to Kevin off-screen.)

NORMA: Give your brother the roll.

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne. Wayne hesitates, then quickly licks the roll and hands it to Kevin. Kevin frowns and sets it on his plate.)

(Wide shot from the kitchen of all. Jack is turned toward the TV.)

Maybe we weren't aware of it then, amid the school paper-drives and the scalloped potatoes and the sounds of the neighbor's children playing...

(Close shot of Kevin looking at Norma off-screen as he chews. The camera moves in slowly.)

(Close shot of Wayne talking and looking toward Jack off-screen. The camera moves in slowly.)

But life was rich there...

(Close shot of Jack holding his glass and smiling at Wayne. The camera moves in slowly.)

In our small sanctuary.

(Close shot of Norma looking toward Jack and smiling as the camera moves in slowly.)

And precious.

(Wide shot from the kitchen of all.)

(The phone rings.)

(Norma rises and walks to the phone.)

And the only thing that could ever change that...

(Norma picks up the phone.)

(Close shot of Kevin turning toward the TV off-screen.)

NORMA (V/O) (On the phone): Hello?

Was death.

(Guitar fades.)

NORMA (V/O): Jack?

(Close shot from the TV's perspective of Jack looking at it, with his hand out over his shoulder toward Norma.)

NORMA: It's your father.

(Shot over Norma's shoulder as Jack quickly turns toward her.)

(Close shot of Kevin looking toward Norma off-screen, concerned.)

Cut to

Int. Day - Living Room

(Shot of the front door as Albert walks in, pauses, holds his arms out, and smiles.)

ALBERT: Hey, hey, hey!

(Wider shot of Albert as Kevin and Wayne hurry toward him, smiling.)

KEVIN: Grandpa!

(They hug.)

ALBERT: How are my boys?

Not that Grandpa was dead, exactly. In fact, he was alive and kickin'.

(Close shot of Kevin smiling as Albert holds him and grabs Kevin's nose. Albert sticks his thumb between his fingers.)

ALBERT: Ah. Got your nose!

(Albert smiles and chuckles.)

Like a fine old wine...

(Kevin laughs tries to grab Albert's fist.)

Or an old smoked-ham...

(Wider shot of Albert, Wayne and Kevin. Albert hold his hand out ready to "get" Wayne's nose. Wayne covers his nose with both hands and Albert gooses him in the stomach.)

The guy just seemed to get more robust with age.

(Albert hugs both boys.)

NORMA (V/O): Hi, Albert.

(Norma approaches past the camera.)

NORMA: Let me take your coat.

(Albert takes off his cap and coat. Kevin and Wayne move off the the side.)

ALBERT: I appreciate you puttin' me up, Norma. I really do.

(Norma takes his cap and coat.)

NORMA: Oh, now...don't be silly - you're always welcome here.

(They hug and kiss each other on the cheek.)

(Norma walks back to the coat rack.)

WAYNE: So, uh, how long you stayin' for, Gramps?

ALBERT: Well...we'll see - we'll see.

(Close shot of Kevin smiling.)

Somehow, he just filled the house with life.

(Close shot of Albert smiling at the kids off-screen as Norma walks back, behind him.)

(Close shot of a suitcase as Jack sets is down just inside the doorway. The camera pans up to Jack as he straightens up and sighs.)

JACK: He's going to a funeral.

(Wide shot past Kevin of all. Norma looks at Jack, then Albert, and gestures.)

NORMA: Who-who died?

ALBERT: Oh.

(Albert turns to Jack.)

ALBERT: You didn't tell 'em, John...

JACK: Uh, no, Dad...I thought you'd probably want to.

(Close shot of Norma frowning at Jack off-screen. Wayne is behind her, also looking at Jack.)

NORMA: Jack?!

(Shot past Albert of Jack, as Albert turns to Norma off-screen.)

ALBERT: Well...I guess you oughtta know. (Nods.) Aunt Rose passed away yesterday morning.

(Wide shot past Kevin of all, as Norma frowns.)

NORMA: Oh, dear...aw...

(Norma glances to Jack and back to Albert.)

NORMA: Poor Aunt Rose.

(Albert puts his arm out and gestures.)

ALBERT: Well, not to worry, Norma. She had a full and productive life.

(Albert nods slightly, then turns to Wayne and Kevin and leans forward slightly.)

ALBERT: Didn't she, boys?

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne. Wayne looks at Kevin.)

KEVIN: Sure, Gramps. (Smiles.)

(Wayne turns to Albert.)

WAYNE: Right!

(Shot past Kevin off all, as Jack carries the suitcase toward the camera.)

It was true. Aunt Rose had had a full and productive life.

(Albert pats Jack on the shoulder and smiles as Jack passes the camera.)

(Close shot of Kevin frowning.)

Which left just one little question.

KEVIN: Who's Aunt Rose?

Cut to

Int. Night - Kevin's Bedroom

(Wayne, Albert and Kevin are sitting on Kevin's bed. Albert is looking at a photograph he is holding.)

ALBERT: Actually, she wasn't you aunt. She was, uh...(gestures.)...well, she was my first-cousin.

(Albert looks at Kevin and nods, then looks at the photos.)

(Close shot of Kevin looking at Albert and the photos off-screen, and yawning sleepily.)

By ten o'clock that night, I was sorry I asked.

(Shot of all from Wayne's side as Albert holds a photograph in front of Wayne.)

ALBERT: Look at that. You know where that was taken?

WAYNE: No...why don't you tell us Grandpa.

(Albert taps the photo and smiles.)

ALBERT: That was up at the lake house.

(Albert points closely at the photo.)

WAYNE: Nice bathing suit.

ALBERT: Yeah, well...that's what they looked like in those days, Wayne.

(Close shot of Albert looking down at the photo off-screen.)

ALBERT: You know, she was...

(Albert looks off and frowns.)

ALBERT: Eighty-two years old when she died.

(Albert pauses, then frowns and shakes his head.)

ALBERT: Can you boys even imagine that?

(He looks from Wayne to Kevin off-screen.)

(Close shot of Kevin smiling slightly at Albert off-screen, then looking off.)

Course, when you're fourteen, eighty-two isn't much different from forty-two, or even a hundred-and-two.

(Close shot of Albert smiling and chuckling.)

Still, if Gramps needed a friendly ear...

(Knock on the door.)

He could always count on us.

JACK (V/O): Come on, Dad.

(Albert looks toward Jack off-screen.)

(Shot of Jack at the doorway, with his hands in his robe pockets.)

JACK: The boys should get some sleep.

(Close shot of Albert looking at Jack off-screen.)

ALBERT: Yeah. You're right, John.

(Albert looks down at the photos off-screen.)

(Shot of Wayne, Albert and Kevin from Wayne's side. Albert tosses the photos on the other bed, then looks at Wayne and puts an arm around his shoulders.)

ALBERT: I guess I've been bending you boys' ear too much, eh? (Smiles.)

(Albert looks at Kevin and puts an arm around him.)

(Kevin and Wayne smile and shake their heads.)

KEVIN & WAYNE: Nah...

KEVIN: It was fun, Grandpa. (Smiles.)

(Albert chuckles and squeezes Kevin.)

It was a lie - but a good lie.

(Albert stands up.)

After all, the guy was goin' to a funeral. The least we could do...

(Shot of Jack at the doorway as Albert walks past the camera toward him.)

Was give him a pleasant send-off.

(Albert passes Jack.)

ALBERT: Oh!

(Albert pause and turns in the doorway, then points at the boys off-screen.)

ALBERT: And set your alarm-clocks!

(Albert gives the thumbs up sign, glances at Jack, then back to the boys off-screen.)

ALBERT: We gotta leave by eight o'clock!

(Albert turns and walks away down the hall, as Jack looks at the boys.)

(Shot of Wayne and Kevin frowning.)

Hold on, here.

(Shot of Jack at the door, looking at Norma as she approaches in her bathrobe, and frowns at him.)

Did he say...?

(Jack turns to the boys off-screen.)

JACK: Did he say "we"?

(Shot of Wayne and Kevin looking at each other.)

Cut to

Kitchen

(Shot of the dining room doorway, and Albert standing near the sink opening a bottle.)

(Albert crosses to the opposite counter as Kevin and Wayne enter and pause.)

It was obvious somebody had to clear this up.

(Jack and Norma appear in the doorway, as Albert opens the refrigerator.)

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Albert as he glances toward the group, closes the refrigerator, and crosses to the sink with a pitcher of water.)

(Shot of the group at the doorway. Kevin and Wayne look over their shoulder at Jack, who looks at Wayne, then Norma.)

We chose the big guy.

(Jack turns toward Albert off-screen.)

JACK: Uh, Dad - about those alarm-clocks...

(Close shot of Albert turning toward Jack off-screen as he closes a cabinet.)

ALBERT: I meant to tell ya - I've forgotten mine. (Gestures.) You'll have to get us up. And we can go in my car.

(Albert looks toward the cabinets.)

(Shot of the group at the doorway. Jack looks down and frowns.)

JACK: Uh, well...you know, Dad...

(Jack looks toward Albert off-screen.)

JACK: We weren't really planning on going to the funeral.

(Albert crosses the kitchen, frowning at the opposite cabinet.)

ALBERT: Not goin'? Of course we're goin'.

(Jack frowns.)

JACK: I-I have to fly to Seattle Thursday morning, and...

(Close shot of Albert looking up into an open cabinet.)

ALBERT: The funeral's tomorrow, John...

(Albert closes the cabinet and looks at Jack off-screen.)

ALBERT: You got plenty of time.

(Albert looks at Norma off-screen.)

ALBERT: Norma, where are the glasses?

(Wide shot of all, as Norma steps forward.)

NORMA: Oh, here. (Smiles.)

(She sets a folded sheet on the counter and walks past Albert.)

NORMA: Let me...

(Norma opens a cabinet.)

Now of course what was needed here was simple clearing of the air.

(Albert approaches and takes a glass from Norma.)

A collective statement of intention.

(Albert and Norma move to the sink. Jack takes a few steps forward, looks down and frowns, then looks at Albert.)

JACK: This just isn't a good time for me, Dad.

(Jack glances at Wayne.)

ALBERT: Funerals...

(Albert turns.)

ALBERT: Are never a good time, John. Besides...

(Albert gestures with his glass.)

ALBERT: I think the boys should go.

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne looking at each other.)

Great. Now he was draggin' us into this.

(Shot past Albert of Jack looking down and frowning.)

JACK: Uh, well...

(Jack looks at Albert.)

JACK: The boys have school...

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne smiling, and Wayne nodding as he eats.)

(Shot past Jack of Albert.)

ALBERT: Then write a note. (Frowns.) I think "death in the family" is an acceptable excuse. (Nods.)

(Shot past Albert of Jack as he glances away.)

JACK: Dad, it -

(Jack shakes his head slightly.)

(Shot past Jack of Albert frowning.)

ALBERT: What is the matter with you, son?! Rose was family. (Nods.) Our family.

(Shot past Albert of Jack as he glances away.)

ALBERT: Doesn't it mean anything to you?

(Jack looks back to Albert, and glances down and back, frowning.)

But the thing is...

(Close shot of Kevin looking at Albert off-screen.)

It really didn't.

(Kevin glances down.)

Not to me, anyway.

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Albert and Jack, and Norma beyond, as Albert points toward the boys.)

ALBERT: I'll bet that...Kevin, there...would...

(Albert glances at Jack, then back to the boys.)

ALBERT: Like to pay his last respects to one of our own.

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne as Wayne looks at him and frowns.)

ALBERT (V/O): Wouldn't you, son?

(Wayne put some food in his mouth and looks at Kevin, who looks toward the group off-screen.)

Suddenly...

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Albert and Jack, and Norma beyond.)

I was all that was standing between us, and Aunt Rose.

(Jack sighs and looks at Kevin.)

(Shot of Kevin, and Wayne frowning at him.)

KEVIN: S-sure, Grandpa. I guess so.

(Wayne looks off.)

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Albert and Jack, and Norma beyond, as Albert smiles and pops a pill in his mouth.)

(Sound of a car horn.)

Cut to

Ext. Day - The road.

(High wide shot of the road as the car approaches and passes the camera.)

WAYNE (V/O): "Sure, Grampa. I guess so."

(Close shot of Wayne in the back seat, frowning at Kevin off-screen.)

WAYNE: Butthead.

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne from Kevin's side as Wayne looks forward, and Kevin glances around.)

It wasn't fair. I'd been cast as the Benedict Arnold of the Arnold clan...

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack riding shotgun and Albert driving, as Jack turns forward.)

Just for being a dutiful grandson.

(Shot of Kevin and Norma from Kevin's side.)

NORMA: Are Phil and Opal coming to the funeral, Albert?

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack and Albert.)

ALBERT: Oh, yeah. (Smiles.) They drove down last night, to help Iris with the arrangements. (Smiles.) And Ray's flyin' in from Portland.

(Close shot of Kevin frowning slightly.)

Iris? Ray? Who were these people?

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack and Albert, as Albert turns to Jack.)

ALBERT: And, uh, Lloyd'll be there, too.

(Albert looks forward as Jack looks at him.)

(Shot from Albert's perspective of Jack looking at him, concerned.)

JACK: Lloyd?

(Shot from Jack's perspective of Albert, as Albert glances at him then back to the road.)

ALBERT: Yeah, you remember Lloyd, he w -

(Albert looks toward Jack.)

JACK (V/O): Yeah.

(Shot from Albert's perspective of Jack looking away.)

JACK: Yeah, I remember.

The thing is...

(Close shot of Kevin.)

I couldn't understand why all of this was so important to the old guy.

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack and Albert.)

ALBERT: It'll be good to see the family again. (Smiles.)

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne from Kevin's side.)

ALBERT: (V/O): Right, Kev?

(Kevin looks forward and frowns slightly.)

And why was he picking on me?

(Kevin looks at Wayne.)

(Close shot of Kevin from Wayne's side.)

KEVIN: Right, Grandpa! (Smiles.)

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack and Albert. Jack is looking forward, as Albert turns toward him.)

ALBERT: I'm glad you decided to come. (Smiles.)

(Jack turns toward Albert. Albert smiles and reaches toward Jack's stomach.)

(Shot from the passenger window as Albert pokes Jack.)

ALBERT: Doodle-oodle-ooo..

(Albert smiles and Jack frowns.)

Cut to

Int. Day - Church

(Shot of white double-doors as a man walks into the shot, looking at the camera.)

FUNERAL DIRECTOR: Here we are...Rose McKenzie.

(The man turns and reaches for both doors.)

(Shot from the other side of the doors as they open toward the camera, as the group stands in front of them.)

(Wide shot of the room and guests as organ music plays. The man leans in front of the camera and looks into it.)

FUNERAL DIRECTOR: My deepest condolences.

(Shot past the man of the group.)

Somehow, I understood exactly what he meant.

(Shot of an older man shaking Wayne's hand, as people move across the shot.)

OLDER MAN: This isn't little Weegie, is it?

(Wayne smiles, as another man approaches, and the older man looks at him, still shaking Wayne's hand.)

OLDER MAN: Ya know why we call him "Weegie" don't ya?

(The older man looks at Wayne.)

OLDER MAN: Because he couldn't say "Wayne" until he was about four years old! (Laughs.)

(The camera pans with the other man as he walks off. The camera stops on Jack and a man pointing at him.)

MAN2: Yessir. Yessir - there was a second gunman on that grassy knoll!

(Shot past the man of Jack looking at him, bored.)

MAN2: I know what I'm talkin' about!

(Shot of Opal smiling and approaching the camera, which pulls back slightly.)

OPAL: And this must be Kevin! Just look at you!

(Shot past Opal of Kevin as Opal grabs his cheek and shakes it.)

OPAL: You look just like your mother!

(Kevin frowns and looks over his shoulder as Opal shakes his cheek. The camera pans over to a man talking to Norma.)

MAN3: Times have been tough, Norma.

(Norma nods.)

MAN3: And I know it wouldn't take much...to get the business back on its feet, again... it's just...one thing after another...

(Norma nods, and looks down.)

MAN3: You know what I mean...(Nods.)

(Norma nods.)

(Close shot of an older woman as she points.)

WOMAN1: You two - you could be twins!

(Shot past the woman of Wayne and Kevin looking at each other.)

All in all, a sobering experience.

(Kevin frowns.)

(Wider shot of Opal walking across the room. The camera pans with her and stops on Wayne, Jack and Kevin standing near the wall, as she walks past them.)

After about forty-five minutes of this...

(Jack looks at his watch.)

Our little twig on the family-tree was just about ready to branch off.

(Kevin holds Jack's arm and looks at his watch.)

(Jack looks off, and pauses.)

JACK: Oh, God...

(Shot of Norma and Lloyd amid a few other people. They look at Jack off-screen. Lloyd smiles and points.)

(Close shot of Jack frowning and sighing.)

JACK: Oh, God.

(Shot of Lloyd and Norma, as Lloyd smiles at Jack off-screen and stage-whispers to him.)

LLOYD: I'll be right over.

(Lloyd turns to Norma.)

LLOYD: Excuse me. (Smiles.)

(Lloyd smiles at two men as he approaches and pats one on the back.)

This was Dad's cousin, Lloyd.

(Lloyd passes between the couple.)

He'd made a mint selling aluminum-siding.

(He smiles and pats a man on the chest, then slows Opal by the shoulders as she walks past.)

And probably the only person in the world with enough nerve...

(He approaches the camera, smiling broadly as the camera pulls back just behind Jack.)

To call my father...

LLOYD: Cous'...

(Shot past Lloyd of Wayne, Jack and Kevin as Jack smiles and shakes Lloyd's hand.)

LLOYD: How the hell ya doin'?

JACK: Just great, Lloyd. (Smiles.) You?

(Shot past Jack of Lloyd.)

LLOYD: Never been better. (Smiles.) Except...(Frowns and nods.)

(Shot from behind Lloyd as he looks over his shoulder.)

LLOYD: Except for this, of course.

(Shot past Jack of Lloyd as he turns forward, then squints at Jack.)

LLOYD: Hey...you're looking different, Jack.

(Wider shot past Lloyd of the guys.)

LLOYD: Put on a few?

(Lloyd taps Jack in the stomach with his fist and chuckles.)

JACK: I don't think so.

(Jack shakes his head and smiles.)

LLOYD: Maybe you're just gettin' old...

(Lloyd reaches his hand toward Jack's face.)

(Closer shot past Lloyd of Jack, as Lloyd slaps his cheek. Jack smiles woodenly.)

(Close shot of Kevin looking up at Jack off-screen.)

It was the kind give-and-take that always affected Dad the same way.

(Kevin looks at Lloyd off-screen.)

(Shot past Lloyd of Jack still smiling.)

JACK: I have to go to the john.

(Jack sighs and looks off, the exits.)

(Wide shot from behind Lloyd as Jack moves past Kevin.)

Good idea.

(Kevin turns to follow Jack. Lloyd grabs Kevin by the shoulder and turns him around.)

LLOYD: Hey!

(Shot past Kevin of Lloyd smiling at him.)

LLOYD: I'll bet I missed a few birthdays in there somewhere...

(Shot past Lloyd of Kevin and Wayne looking at each other. Lloyd holds up a money-clip of folded bills.)

(Close shot of Lloyd's hands as he slides a $20 out.)

LLOYD (V/O): I don't have any change...

(Shot past Lloyd of Kevin and Wayne looking at the money.)

LLOYD: You can split this up, can't you?

(Wayne looks at Lloyd.)

Hell-o, 'Cous!

WAYNE: Sure...

(Wayne nods and smiles slightly. Kevin looks at Lloyd and smiles.)

KEVIN: You bet!

(Lloyd sticks the money in Kevin's breast pocket.)

KEVIN: Thanks!

(Shot past Kevin of Lloyd smiling at him.)

LLOYD: No problem...

(Shot past Lloyd of Kevin as Lloyd slaps him on the shoulder.)

LLOYD: Get yourself somethin' real nice. OK?

(Lloyd exits.)

And suddenly...

(Wayne and Kevin look at each other and smile.)

We were starting to feel pretty kindly towards Aunt Rose...

(Albert approaches behind Wayne and puts his hands on Wayne and Kevin's back.)

ALBERT: Alright, boys.

(Albert smiles and pats their backs.)

ALBERT: Time to say goodbye.

(Close shot of Kevin looking toward Wayne off-screen.)

(Close shot of Wayne looking toward Kevin off-screen.)

(Wide shot past the flowers on the casket of Wayne, Albert and Kevin. Organ music plays in the church as they hesitate, then approach.)

(Shot from inside the casket looking up to the ceiling. Wayne and Kevin approach and look down. Wayne frowns, and Kevin glances at Wayne, then down. Opal approaches between them.)

OPAL: Doesn't she look natural?

(Opal looks from one end to the other, then looks at Kevin.)

OPAL: They do such good work here.

(Opal looks in again and shakes her head slightly, then exits.)

(Kevin and Wayne look in again, and Wayne frowns.)

As we stood there...

(Close shot of Kevin as he tilts his head.)

Face-to-face with mortality...

(Close shot of Wayne looking in and frowning.)

It's hard to describe the emotions that swelled within us.

(Wayne turns to Kevin off-screen.)

WAYNE: Give me the money! (Frowns.)

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne as Kevin turns to him.)

KEVIN: What?! (Frowns.)

(Shot past Kevin of Wayne.)

WAYNE: Half of it's mine - I'll get the change.

(Shot past Wayne of Kevin.)

KEVIN: Wrong...I'll get the change. (Nods.)

(Shot past Kevin of Wayne as Kevin looks in again.)

WAYNE: OK - fine. I trust you.

(Kevin looks at Wayne, as Wayne looks down.)

(Shot from inside the casket of Kevin and Wayne. Wayne reaches into Kevin's pocket and snatches the money. Kevin grabs it back. Wayne grabs it again and smiles. Kevin reaches for it again, and it falls out of Wayne's hand onto the camera. The boys look at it.)

(Close shot of Kevin wide-eyed.)

(Close shot of Wayne wide-eyed. He tilts his head and frowns.)

(The classic bit of "Tocata and Fugue in D Minor" - Bach plays.)

(Close shot of Kevin.)

(Shot from the casket of both looking in.)

In the presence of death...mere words often seem...inadequate.

(Wayne taps Kevin on the shoulder and points.)

WAYNE: Go on, get it.

(Kevin turns suddenly to Wayne.)

KEVIN: No way! (Frowns.)

(Kevin looks in again. Wayne grabs him by the lapel.)

WAYNE: I said...get it! (Frowns.)

KEVIN: Why don't you get it?

WAYNE: I don't think so.

(Wayne pushes Kevin away, and they look in the casket.)

Sure - it was only about eighteen inches or so, but in the greater scheme of things...

(Wayne looks ill, and sighs.)

That twenty-dollar bill was from here to eternity.

(Kevin looks over his shoulder as a woman approaches, and glances at Wayne.)

IRIS?: I know you boys are going to miss her...

(She looks at Kevin.)

IRIS?: But remember...

(Kevin looks at her. She looks inthe casket.)

IRIS?: She's at peace, now. (Smiles.)

(She looks at Wayne and exits. Wayne makes a face.)

Maybe she was...

Cut to

Restroom

(Close shot of Wayne frowning as he holds up a piece of string and pulls some gum from his mouth.)

But we weren't.

(Wayne frowns as he sticks the gum on the end of the string.)

WAYNE: Alright...we walk up to the casket...

(Wayne looks at Kevin off-screen and points.)

WAYNE: You keep a look out...

(Wayne smiles and jerks his thumb at himself as he walks forward. The camera pans with him.)

WAYNE: And I'll take care of the rest. You got it?

(Wayne walks past Kevin.)

KEVIN: Are you sure we should do this?

(Wayne turns and frowns.)

WAYNE: What's the matter - ya chicken?

KEVIN: No, I'm not chicken.

WAYNE: Well, then you gotta help me.

KEVIN: No, I don't!

WAYNE: Yes, you do! (Gestures.) You dropped it!

(Kevin slaps his chest.)

KEVIN: I didn't drop it!

(Wayne grabs Kevin by the shoulders and pushes him back.)

WAYNE: Yes you did drop it!

KEVIN: No, I didn't drop it!

(Shot from the ceiling of Kevin and Wayne scuffling against the sinks, as Albert walks in and pauses.)

WAYNE: It's twenty bucks!

KEVIN: I reached for your hand and you...

ALBERT: Hey! Hey! Hey!

(Close shot of Albert frowning at the boys off-screen.)

ALBERT: What's goin' on? (Frowns.)

(Shot of Wayne and Kevin as they separate and look at Albert off-screen. Kevin steps away from the sinks.)

KEVIN: Nothing, Grandpa.

(Close shot of Albert frowning at the boys off-screen.)

ALBERT: Well, cut it out!

(Albert leans a little closer and frowns.)

ALBERT: This is a funeral - not a fist-fight.

(Shot of Wayne and Kevin looking at Albert off-screen.)

(Close shot of Albert frowning at the boys off-screen.)

ALBERT: Now, where's your dad?

(Shot of Wayne and Kevin looking at Albert off-screen.)

WAYNE: We don't know. (Shrugs.)

(Close shot of Albert frowning at the boys off-screen and turning slightly toward the door.)

ALBERT: It's time to drive to the cemetery.

(Albert leans a little closer and frowns.)

ALBERT: Besides, he's already missed the coffin-closing. (Gestures.)

(Shot of Wayne and Kevin looking at Albert off-screen, then turning to each other.)

Cut to

The Coffin

(Shot past Opal and a man as Wayne approaches through a doorway. The camera pans with Wayne as he frowns, looking toward the coffin. Kevin follows.)

(They pause and frown.)

(Wide shot past two women of the closed casket in the background.)

Yeah. It looked like this case was closed, alright.

(The funeral director slides the flowers to the center of the casket.)

Cut to

Ext. Day - Funeral Precession

(Shot of a rural road as a line of cars, led by the hearse, approaches.)

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack and Albert, as Albert turns and frowns.)

ALBERT: The hell were you doin' back there, John?

(Jack is looking off.)

JACK: I was gettin' some air.

ALBERT: "Getting some air"?

(Shot of from Wayne's side of Wayne, Kevin and Norma in the back seat.)

I guess you could say it was a kind of a solemn ride to the gravesite.

NORMA: The flowers look lovely, Albert.

ALBERT (V/O): Yeah.

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack and Albert.)

ALBERT: They were, weren't they? I haven't seen so many flowers since...Helen died.

(Albert turns to Jack, who is looking out the window.)

ALBERT: You remember that don't ya, John?

JACK: Yeah. Yeah, I remember, Dad.

(Albert glances at Jack then looks forward and shakes his head slightly.)

ALBERT: Shoo - Boy, it was hot that day, remember?

(Shot from Albert's perspective perspective of Jack as he raises his eye-brows and glances down.)

JACK: Dad, I remember, OK?

(Shot from Jack's perspective of Albert.)

ALBERT: Just making conversation.

(Shot from Albert's perspective perspective of Jack as he frowns and looks off.)

But while Gramps and Dad chewed the fat in the front seat...

(Close shot of Kevin.)

Where I sat...

(Shot from Kevin's side of Kevin and Wayne. Wayne looks at him and frowns.)

I had problems of my own.

(Wayne hits Kevin on the shoulder.)

KEVIN: Hey!

(Shot from Wayne's side of Wayne, Kevin and Norma.)

KEVIN: Cut it out! (Frowns.)

WAYNE: Oh, sure - after I hit you once...(gestures)...for every dollar you lost.

(Kevin points to himself.)

KEVIN: Hey, I didn't lose it!

(Wayne starts hitting Kevin.)

(Shot from Kevin's side of Kevin and Wayne, as Wayne pauses and smiles.)

WAYNE: Ooh - lost count. I better start over again. (Smiles.)

(Shot from Wayne's side as he starts to hit Kevin again. Norma turns to Wayne and frowns.)

NORMA: Wayne!

(Kevin continues to fend off Wayne as Wayne hits him.)

NORMA: Kevin! Stop it!

(Close shot of Albert as he turns over his shoulder.)

ALBERT: Alright - I told you boys!

(Shot of Wayne, Kevin and Norma. Norma looks at them as they settle down.)

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack and Albert. Jack is frowning and looking out the window as Albert turns forward.)

ALBERT: Now, let's just-just all try to put a good face on this. Alright?

(Close shot of Kevin looking at Albert off-screen.)

But the fact is, I didn't feel like putting on a face.

(Kevin glances off.)

KEVIN: Man...

ALBERT (V/O): John...

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack and Albert.)

ALBERT: There's somethin' I've been meaning to talk to you about.

(Close shot of Kevin looking down.)

I was a fourteen-year-old kid with a sore shoulder...

(Kevin looks toward Wayne off-screen.)

Down ten bucks...

(Close shot of Wayne frowning at Kevin off-screen.)

On my way in a cramped car...

(Wayne makes a face at Kevin.)

(Close shot of Kevin frowning at Wayne off-screen, then turning forward.)

To bury somebody who had absolutely nothing to do with me.

(Kevin frowns, and scooches around in the seat.)

ALBERT (V/O): Have you, uh...

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack and Albert.)

ALBERT: Have you thought any more about buyin' that plot next to your mother and me?

(Close shot of Kevin looking at Albert off-screen.)

And then, suddenly...Aunt Rose's funeral hit home.

(Kevin looks at Jack off-screen.)

(Shot from Albert's perspective of Jack looking forward.)

JACK: Dad, you we have to talk about this?

(Shot from Jack's perspective of Albert looking forward.)

ALBERT: Something you should be thinkin' about.

(Albert glances at Jack off-screen, then back to the road.)

(Shot from Albert's perspective of Jack.)

JACK: Dad...(Frowns.)

(Close shot of Kevin looking at Albert off-screen.)

ALBERT (V/O): You don't want these boys makin' the decisions...

(Kevin glances at Norma, then Wayne off-screen.)

ALBERT (V/O): Do ya?

(Kevin looks at Albert off-screen.)

ALBERT (V/O): They'll have enough to think about when the time comes.

(Wayne starts to elbow Kevin.)

(Shot from Albert's perspective of Jack frowning and turning toward him.)

JACK: Dad, I've taken care of it, OK?

(Shot of Wayne, Kevin and Norma, as Wayne frowns and continues to elbow Kevin.)

It was the first I'd heard that my dad had a little patch of earth with his name on it.

(Shot from Kevin's side of Kevin and Wayne.)

And of course, there was only one thing to do about it.

(Kevin turns toward Wayne.)

(Shot of Wayne, Kevin, and Norma, as Kevin starts hitting Wayne.)

NORMA: Boys! You just stop it!

(Close shot of Albert frowning and looking toward the side of the road as he pulls over.)

ALBERT: Alright. Alright!

(Shot of Wayne, Kevin, and Norma, as Kevin and Wayne pause and look at Albert off-screen.)

(Close shot of Albert looking over his shoulder.)

ALBERT: Get out. The both of ya!

(Shot from Kevin's side as Kevin and Wayne look at Albert off-screen.)

KEVIN: What?! (Frowns.)

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack looking down, and Albert looking over his shoulder.)

ALBERT: If you can't go to a funeral...(gestures)...and be respectful...(gestures)...then don't go! (Frowns.)

(Close shot of Kevin as he glances toward Norma, then Albert off-screen.)

KEVIN: Grampa -

ALBERT (V/O): If you change your mind...

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack looking down, and Albert looking over his shoulder, and pointing.)

ALBERT: The cemetery is two miles down the road! (Frowns.)

(Shot from Wayne's side of Wayne, Kevin and Norma, as Kevin looks toward Jack off-screen.)

KEVIN: Dad!

(Shot from Albert's perspective of Jack looking off.)

Hmmm. No help there.

(Close shot of Norma looking at Jack off-screen.)

Or there.

(Norma looks at Kevin off-screen.)

(Close shot of Kevin looking at Albert off-screen, and frowning.)

So, I just had to hope Gramps was bluffing.

(Shot from the passenger window of Jack looking off, and Albert looking over his shoulder.)

ALBERT: I'm serious about this, dammit! Now get out!

(Shot from Kevin's side of Kevin and Wayne.)

KEVIN: But, I -

ALBERT (V/O): Now!

(Wayne frowns and shrugs slightly, then starts to open the door.)

(Shot of the side of the car as Wayne opens the door and gets out, followed by Kevin.)

(The camera pans over with Wayne and Kevin as they stand next to each other. They frown as the off-screen car pulls away, shooting gravel and dirt.)

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of the road, and the car driving away.)

I had never seen my grandfather so furious.

(The car disappears around a turn.)

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne, as Wayne walks past Kevin.)

And there ya had it.

(Kevin looks toward Wayne off-screen.)

Stranded in the middle of nowhere...

(Kevin looks toward the road.)

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of the empty road.)

With nothing to show for it...

(Shot of Kevin lookng toward the road.)

But a clean suit.

(A dirt clod hits Kevin on his shoulder. He frowns and looks at Wayne off-screen.)

KEVIN: Ow!

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Wayne across the street, pointing at him.)

WAYNE: First - you lose my money!

(Wayne bends down and picks up a dirt clod.)

WAYNE: And now this, butthead!

(Wayne throws it at Kevin.)

(Shot from Wayne's perspective of Kevin across the street as the dirt clod hits him.)

KEVIN: You idiot! (Frowns.)

(Kevin bends down and picks up a dirt clod, and throws it.)

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Wayne as he dances out of the way, then gestures.)

WAYNE: Whoa! Jerk!

(Wayne bends down and picks up a dirt clod.)

(Close shot of Kevin frowning at Wayne off-screen.)

KEVIN: Moron!

(Close shot of Wayne throwing the dirt clod.)

WAYNE: Dorkface!

(Wayne frowns, then starts to walk along the side of the road.)

(Wider shot of Kevin as he gestures.)

KEVIN: Where are you goin'?

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Wayne as he raises his hand above his head and points.)

WAYNE: I'm walkin'!

(Wayne continues to walk.)

(Wider shot of Kevin frowning at Wayne off-screen.)

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Wayne as he continues to walk away.)

Grief wears a lot of faces.

(Closer shot of Kevin frowning at Wayne off-screen.)

Some people cry...some people hand out money...

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Wayne as he continues to walk away.)

Others throw dirt clods.

(Wider shot of Kevin frowning at Wayne off-screen.)

And for the first time that day...

(Kevin looks over his shoulder, then back to Wayne off-screen, and gestures.)

KEVIN: Hey, wait up!

(Kevin starts to walk forward.)

(Wide shot of Kevin walking away from the camera, and Wayne in the distance picking up another dirt clod.)

I was starting to feel a little grief of my own.

WAYNE: Jerk!

(Snuff's guitar starts and plays through the next scene.)

(Wayne throws the dirt clod.)

(Kevin throws a dirt clod.)

KEVIN: Idiot!

WAYNE: Scrote!

(Wayne throws another dirt clod.)

Fade to

Ext. Day - The Funeral Service

(Shot from the end of the casket, with a row of people on both sides, and the pastor at the other end of the casket, holding an open Bible.)

PASTOR: We ask that You comfort them in their loss...as you receive Rose in Your kingdom.

(High wide shot of the group around the casket.)

PASTOR: Amen.

ALL: Amen.

Some journeys take longer than others.

(Shot of Wayne and Kevin approaching the camera across the cemetery grass, as Kevin trots forward to catch up with Wayne.)

By the time we got to the cemetery that afternoon...

(Wayne adjusts his tie.)

I knew I'd travelled more than just two miles.

(Kevin pauses, as Wayne continues forward.)

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of the group around the casket as Wayne approaches them.)

Something was happening in my life.

(Guitar ends.)

(Shot from the end of the casket, with a row of people on both sides, as Wayne joins a row.)

Something so big...I couldn't take it all in.

PASTOR: And though we feel poorer for her passing...

(Shot past Wayne's shoulder as Kevin approaches behind him.)

PASTOR (V/O): We should seek comfort...

(Kevin stands next to Wayne and looks across to Jack off-screen.)

PASTOR (V/O): In the knowledge that we are, in fact...

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Norma, Jack and Albert.)

PASTOR (V/O): So much richer.

(Shot past Jack and Norma of Kevin and Wayne. Wayne is looking at the pastor off-screen, while Kevin looks toward Jack.)

PASTOR (V/O): Richer for having known her. For having...

(Kevin looks toward the pastor off-screen.)

(Shot from the end of the casket of the two rows of people and the pastor at the far end.)

PASTOR: Been touched by her kindness.

(The pastor glances around the group several people.)

PASTOR: Would...anyone like to say a few words about Rose McKenzie?

(Shot past Jack and Norma of Kevin and Wayne.)

ALBERT (V/O): I, uh...

(Shot past the pastor of Albert, Jack and Norma. Jack looks at Albert.)

ALBERT: I believe I would.

(The pastor steps back and Albert walks toward the end of the casket.)

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne as Albert crosses the camera, and takes off his hat. He pauses, then clears his throat.)

(Close shot of Albert holding his hat in front of him, as he looks toward the casket.)

ALBERT: I guess, uh...

(Albert looks up and gestures, then looks down again.)

ALBERT: I guess my cousin, Rose...

(Albert glances at both rows of people off-screen.)

ALBERT: Liked family gatherings more than anyone I've ever known.

(Albert frowns and looks down.)

(Shot of a man, and Opal.)

ALBERT (V/O): Even after she had...

(Shot of Lloyd, the older woman, and two people behind them.)

ALBERT (V/O): Trouble gettin' around, she...

(Shot of Norma and Jack looking down.)

ALBERT (V/O): Always loved to have a chance to see...

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne. Kevin is looking at Albert off-screen, while Wayne looks down.)

ALBERT (V/O): The folks.

(Wayne looks toward Albert off-screen.)

(Close shot of Albert looking around the people off-screen.)

ALBERT: As she liked to call us. Course, lately...(gestures)...it seems like the only time we get together is, uh...when there's a wedding, or...(Gestures.)

(Shot from the end of the casket of the group, and Albert at the opposite end.)

ALBERT: Or when somebody leaves us.

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne looking at Albert off-screen. The camera moves in on Kevin slowly.)

As I stood there...listening to Grandpa's words...a lot of things began to become real for me. Aunt Rose.

(Kevin glances down, then toward Albert off-screen.)

The loss Gramps was feeling.

(Kevin looks toward Jack and Norma off-screen.)

And why coming here was so important...

(Close shot of Norma turning slightly and looking at Kevin off-screen, then smiling slightly.)

(Close shot of Jack looking at Kevin off-screen.)

For all of us.

(Jack looks down.)

ALBERT (V/O): But, I can tell you one thing...

(Close shot of Albert looking toward Jack's row off-screen, then down.)

ALBERT: Rose...

(Albert looks over the other row off-screen.)

ALBERT: Is not gone from us.

(Albert looks toward Jack's row again.)

ALBERT: She never will be.

(Albert looks down.)

ALBERT: She will always...

(Albert looks toward a man off-screen.)

(Close shot of a man looking at Albert off-screen.)

ALBERT (V/O): Be a part of us...

(Close shot of Opal.)

ALBERT (V/O): As long as we remain a family.

(Close shot of Kevin looking at Albert off-screen.)

ALBERT (V/O): Part of...the folks.

(Kevin looks toward Jack off-screen.)

(Close shot of Albert looking down, and hesitating.)

ALBERT: Part of who we are.

(Albert looks at Kevin off-screen.)

ALBERT: Even for those who...really didn't know her very well.

(Close shot of Kevin looking toward Albert off-screen.)

(Close shot of Albert glancing at Kevin off-screen.)

I guess that's when I understood...

(Close shot of Kevin looking toward Albert off-screen.)

(Close shot of Albert as he looks down.)

What my grandfather had been trying to explain to me.

(Close shot of Kevin looking toward Albert off-screen.)

That my life was bigger than the little neighborhood I lived in.

(Kevin looks down.)

And that these strangers who surrounded me...

(Close shot of Kevin looking toward Albert off-screen.)

(Shot from the end of the casket of the group, as Albert un-pins the carnation from his lapel.)

Weren't just relatives...

(Shot of Kevin and Wayne. Wayne is looking down, about to cry, as Kevin turns to him.)

They were my family.

(Kevin glances at the people behind Wayne.)

And the death of one...

(Kevin looks at Wayne.)

Affected each of us in some way.

(Wayne turns to Kevin and shrugs.)

WAYNE: Hey! It's twenty bucks...

(Wayne looks down and wipes his eye.)

(Close shot of Albert looking down, holding a white carnation.)

ALBERT: We'll be seein' ya, Rose.

(Albert taps the carnation slightly in his hand, nods slightly, then shakes his head.)

(Snuffy's guitar starts and plays through the next scene.)

(Shot from the end of the casket of the group, as Albert leans forward and sets the carnation on the casket.)

(Wide shot from behind Albert. The camera pulls back slowly as the group starts to mingle around.)

Fade to

Night - On the Road

(Shot of the dark road as the car approaches in the distance, and drives past the camera.)

(Close shot of Kevin looking at Jack driving, then Norma off-screen.)

The thread of my Aunt Rose's life had been permanently woven into mine.

(Kevin looks toward Albert in the passenger seat, off-screen.)

Leaving me with questions.

(Close shot of Jack looking at the road.)

And driving home that night...

(Close shot of Albert asleep.)

My fragile little family hurtling through the darkness...

(Close shot of Wayne asleep.)

I knew I'd have to face those questions one day.

(Close shot of Norma asleep. The camera moves in slowly.)

(Close shot of Kevin glancing at Albert, then Wayne, then Jack off-screen.)

(Shot of Jack looking at the road as Kevin leans forward and rests on the seat back.)

(Guitar fades.)

KEVIN: Dad?

JACK: Hmmm?

(Kevin looks off.)

(Close shot of Kevin looking toward Albert, then Jack off-screen.)

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Jack looking at the road.)

(Close shot of Kevin looking toward Albert, then Jack off-screen.)

KEVIN: Don't ever die, OK?

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Jack looking over his shoulder and frowning.)

(Close shot of Kevin looking toward Jack off-screen.)

(Shot from Kevin's perspective of Jack looking over his shoulder and frowning, then looking forward.)

JACK: Nahhh...

(He looks over his shoulder.)

JACK: I'm not gonna die. (Smiles.)

(Shot of Jack and Kevin. Jack looks forward, as Kevin smiles and looks off.)

But for now...

(Jack glances at Kevin, then back to the road.)

That was good enough for me.

(High wide shot of the road as the car passes under the camera. The camera pans up with it as it recedes and disappears in the misty distance.)

(Sound of an owl hooting.)

Fade to

CLOSING CREDITS

Supporting Cast
Albert - David Huddleston
Lloyd - Arlen Dean Snyder
Aunt Opal - Helen Page Camp
Pastor - Earl Boen

Music
"Tocata and Fugue in D Minor" - Bach



Next Episode
Titles/Transcripts
Episode Info
Wonder Years Menu

01/21/99 21:07